A Boudoir Shoot is NOT Porn | NYC Boudoir Photographer

 

I was excited to read to this article on boudoir photography on Jezebel, written by Doug Barry.

“Hey!” I said, “they’re talking about boudoir photography. I do that!”

But then I got mad.

The overall tone of the article is grossly shaming, and implies that silly women are getting boudoir shoots done for a whole list of silly reasons.

“A lot of women do boudoir because they’re afraid their fiancés are looking at porn,” … “and they’d rather them be looking at her.”

What?! A pornographic video and a smokin’ hot photo of the woman you love are NOT the same thing. They are not even close to being the same thing. Not much needs to be said about what porn is. We all know what it’s for and how most of us use it. But I’ll talk about what a boudoir shot is: it’s a celebration of beauty, sexiness and sexuality, and a whole lot of fun. It’s empowering, and brave. It can take some of it’s cues, even a LOT of it’s cues, from a hardcore porn shoot, but the purpose is not the same, and the purpose is everything. Everything.

“Some women get more undressed than others —photographs range from “tasteful” lingerie shots to pornier pictures.”

Ugh. Another inaccurate reference to porn, and this time he gets even more insulting by deeming lingerie as “tasteful”. Ok, Doug, so as long as my clients are covered up, they have taste? When does it become “less tasteful”, and by whose yardstick are we measuring taste, anyway? Because from where I’m standing, a gal could wrap herself ankle to chin in a bed sheet or thrust her naked muff at my camera, and both of those are just fine. To me, it’s all a celebration of being sexy as all get out, and that will never, ever be distasteful. (The phrase you were looking for, you oaf, is “covered-up” – I even wouldn’t have taken much issue if you had chosen “modest”.)

The worst part of this article is the overall assumption that boudoir shoots are just for hetero ladies to give to their hetero menfolk. Not true. First, I’ve done boudoir shoots for lesbians, for gentlemen, and for ladies who are glowing and bursting at the seams with soon-to-be-born baby. And of course hetero ladies with engagement rings, too. They’re all worthy, and they’re all sexy. Second, you don’t do a boudoir shoot for someone, you do it for you. Even if the resulting photos are bound in a book and presented as a gift to a lover, even if you did slink around in his favorite hockey jersey, the benefit of the goodness of the photo shoot falls directly to the person who posed, because she (or he) did something bold that made them look and feel amazing.

There is nothing – NOTHING – shameful about that.

 

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5 Comments

  1. Posted August 13, 2012 at 1:28 pm | Permalink

    A-frickin’-MEN.

  2. Keavy
    Posted August 13, 2012 at 3:05 pm | Permalink

    Awesome. totally awesome.

  3. Posted August 13, 2012 at 4:17 pm | Permalink

    YES!

  4. Posted August 13, 2012 at 4:27 pm | Permalink

    I read that article as well and thought that it was way off-base as well.

  5. Johanna
    Posted August 13, 2012 at 9:59 pm | Permalink

    As one of the girls pictured above, YES. I did a boudoir shoot with Amber because I was two weeks away from running my first marathon, and I was finally, FINALLY proud of the amazing, powerful things my body could do.

    And I am so proud of that. I will always have those photos to look at and remember being thrilled with my amazing body.
    (Plus, when people ask me how I met Amber, I have a great answer! “She took pictures of me in my underwear!)

One Trackback

  • By Boudoir photography: The divisive new wedding trend on August 13, 2012 at 8:31 pm

    [...] it just straight, childless brides who commission boudoir photos?Not at all, says Brooklyn photographer Amber Marlow at her blog. Marlow, who specializes in boudoir photography, says she has “done boudoir shoots for [...]

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